During my morning wake up and scroll through Facebook I saw an article about a young woman’s first date, that seemed to go well…until she suddenly stopped hearing from the guy. In my day (sounding like I’m an old fossil) we called it the disappearing act, but now it’s called ghosting apparently. Yeah, I had no idea we were calling it that either!
Let’s face it, no matter how awesome we are, we’ve either done this or had this happen…and probably more than once! A couple years ago, I was dating someone who I won’t call out because we’re still Facebook friends and will probably see this 😫 but we were dating for a few months, talked everyday on the phone, and dare I say it, I was beginning to fall in l_ _ _ with him. Then one day we were having our daily chat after work, he said he was going into the store and would call me back…only he never did!
After trying to call him a few times, sent a few texts, and even Facebook messages, I realized that I wouldn’t be hearing from him again, but why? The worse part is that we had even had numerous conversations about this topic and both agreed that we weren’t into game playing and if either of us were no longer interested we would be honest and tell each other.
It definitely sucks when this happens. Not only are your feelings hurt, you’re confused, and just left wondering why. And when you’re well into your 30’s you really should be mature enough to be able to express your feelings and not just cease all communication and fall off the face of the earth just because you’re a coward and would rather disappear.
Of course I moved on eventually, but if I had the chance, even today, I’d want to have the conversation with him and find out why it ended the way it did. Although my trusty woman’s intuition tells me that when this happens, 99.9% of the time, they either met someone new or someone old came back into their lives.
Girls, if you haven’t found yourselves in this position, unfortunately you probably will, but it happens and life goes on. Karma is also a mighty biotch!
Let’s just call it what it is stupid and immature. Who does that?! I’ve dated my share of jerks when I was dating but this takes it to a whole different level. #blmgirl
Oh I totally agree! But unfortunately this is reality these days…even for us who are beyond grown adults! It’s quite sad and frustrating though!
There was a great article in the NYTimes last year where people shared stories of being ghosted on or ghosting on friends/dates/exes. I feel like it’s a problem that’s getting worse as it seems like we have a whole generation growing up able to hide behind their phones instead of facing difficult situations head on. I hope I’m wrong, because It’s lame.
You are so right! The root of the problem is the comfort of hiding behind technology and the lack of real communication skills!!!!! Ugh so annoying!
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